tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post924129989159466922..comments2023-08-27T06:53:36.768-06:00Comments on LANL: The Rest of the Story: Customer ServiceFrank Younghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02134775226991383924noreply@blogger.comBlogger92125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-62191099753966469572009-12-24T16:34:20.382-07:002009-12-24T16:34:20.382-07:00"I ain't shittin ya. Only difference is t..."I ain't shittin ya. Only difference is that the work will be performed by LANS employees and directed by LANS managers. Is that scary or what?"<br /><br />12/24/09 6:24 AM<br /><br /><br />That's scary stuff. I guess Mikey and his Get-Rich-Quick buddies are all shooting for a 95% performance score from NNSA for next year.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-87198060438042711842009-12-24T06:24:03.083-07:002009-12-24T06:24:03.083-07:00"The FDE exercise on laptops was so successfu..."The FDE exercise on laptops was so successful that now we are going to implement it on every single desktop at LANS." (8:00 PM)<br /><br />OMG, you've got to be kidding, right? <br /><br />Please, tell me this is just a joke!<br /><br />12/23/09 8:59 PM<br /><br />I ain't shittin ya. Only difference is that the work will be performed by LANS employees and directed by LANS managers. Is that scary or what?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-75272524416969167332009-12-23T20:59:36.797-07:002009-12-23T20:59:36.797-07:00"The FDE exercise on laptops was so successfu..."The FDE exercise on laptops was so successful that now we are going to implement it on every single desktop at LANS." (8:00 PM)<br /><br />OMG, you've got to be kidding, right? <br /><br />Please, tell me this is just a joke!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-19099472372250568292009-12-23T08:23:00.833-07:002009-12-23T08:23:00.833-07:0010:28 Once upon a time Los Alamos employees, from...10:28 Once upon a time Los Alamos employees, from the janitor to the director, "got paid" to defend the free world - a job we took enormous pride in and one that we did extremely well. Tragically, you are correct. Today we are paid to stand in a bread line with Bechtilian scum like you waiting to get our share.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-18894774475027012572009-12-22T22:28:51.101-07:002009-12-22T22:28:51.101-07:00Back to Freestone's customer service monologue...Back to Freestone's customer service monologue:<br /><br />You get paid to get trained, whether the training matters or not. <br /><br />You get paid to stand in line, whether that matters or not. <br /><br />You get paid to wait for other people to do their jobs. <br /><br />You get paid to attend management meetings, whether they matter or not.<br /><br />I fail to understand why so many people whine about poor customer service, when said poor customer service provides so many opportunities for your tenure at LANL to pass uneventfully. If you can just endure 35 years of waiting for other people to figure out what they are supposed to be doing, you can retire. It's easy!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-2734519312706415222009-12-22T20:00:52.066-07:002009-12-22T20:00:52.066-07:00Take heed everyone. The FDE exercise on laptops w...Take heed everyone. The FDE exercise on laptops was so successful that now we are going to implement it on every single desktop at LANS. Are we having fun yet?<br /><br />MikeyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-78703955228995861762009-12-22T18:08:39.147-07:002009-12-22T18:08:39.147-07:00What if I like the way Bret Knapp treats me? Then ...What if I like the way Bret Knapp treats me? Then what? Can I get a free promotion like most of the deadwood management in the weapons program?<br /><br />12/14/09 7:05 PM<br /><br />Absolutely. In W-Division we have Mark Ledoux and Tony Vidlak as Executive Vice Division Directors. To boot, James Owen just got promoted to their level; now there are 3 huge mouths to fed. What a joke! W-Division has more personnel in the Division Office than they have in all the Groups combined. And this was due to Bret Knapp's great "hands on" leadership! Incidentally, what does W-Division do?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-80925763284245836532009-12-20T11:11:23.263-07:002009-12-20T11:11:23.263-07:00"(3) Timely, consistent, and effective commun..."(3) Timely, consistent, and effective communication;"<br /><br />OK, let's just take one example: FDE. First, every laptop owner with an off-site pass was emailed an explanation of what they needed to do. So far so good. <br /><br />Then, direction abruptly changed and EVERY laptop was required to get FDE, regardless of offsite use or not. This was communicated via OCSR's, not to laptop owners directly. <br /><br />Eventually line organizations were told that exceptions could be requested by sending an email to a certain address. After sending such an email, the line org's received an auto-response that exceptions needed to be individually filed by the laptop owner through the CIO footprints request system. <br /><br />The FDE Depot itself established an email address, but never responded to any emails. The staff had cell phones available, but only gave out the phone number only under duress. <br /><br />Deadlines and requirements were spontaneously revised. After Sept 30, suddenly it was announced that the FY09 quota had been met so there was no longer any urgency to finish the job. The FDE depot closed, with no mechanism established to complete the job, e.g. for laptops used by COS employees. <br /><br />So in summary: Communication has varied from reasonable, to unpredictable, to non existent. Heckuva job!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-10101677515042160072009-12-20T09:36:05.293-07:002009-12-20T09:36:05.293-07:00What a joke. A+ from DOE.What a joke. A+ from DOE.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-76742804855832070752009-12-20T07:14:11.051-07:002009-12-20T07:14:11.051-07:00"In response to requests from the Laboratory&..."In response to requests from the Laboratory's programmatic organizations, the Office of the CIO and Network/Infrastructure Engineering Division (NIE) have decided not to interrupt Internet service or quarantine e-mail over the Winter Closure." (Office of the CIO)<br /><br />Promises, promises,.....you mean like last year? Personally, I wouldn't have gone on out on this limb. You know, shit happens.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-67174100406429607192009-12-20T06:28:46.319-07:002009-12-20T06:28:46.319-07:00What on earth does any of it mean?
"nternall...What on earth does any of it mean?<br /><br />"nternally, we have:<br />(1) Developed evaluation metrics for IT<br />(The computers are running and we got paid.)<br /><br /> and Information Security<br /><br />(No embarrassing lapses stayed in the press for long.)<br /><br /> that tie support performance back to programmatic delivery;<br /><br />(We got paid.)<br /><br />(2) Improved our portfolio management and IT governance processes;<br /><br />(Created homemade versions of commercial software and have them mostly installed. We are faster at beating up people who stray from the plan. We will have the plan done in 2013. We like the letters HTML.)<br /><br />(3) Streamlined processes and reduced process-imposed overhead.<br /><br />(One person took a job somewhere else and was not replaced.)<br /><br />Hopefully, though, you've had the opportunity to experience our external-facing <br />(The Chinese like what we have done.)<br /><br />improvements first hand:<br />(1) Increased focus on customer satisfaction;<br /><br />(Last year we did not give a sh*% about customers. This year we have improved to 'don't care.')<br /><br />(2) Face-to-face meetings with the programmatic community to better understand their needs and challenges;<br /><br />(We went to meetings, did not listen, took a couple of notes, and did not change anything. Next year, more meetings.)<br /><br />(3) Timely, consistent, and effective communication;<br /><br />(We knew what time it was on the clock when messages were sent. The messages were the same ones we sent last year. The messages were effective because they took very little time to compose and we saved more time by not reading the responses.)<br /><br />(4) Forward progress on IT and InfoSec issues affecting the mission."<br /><br />(Some of the PCs in manager's offices were out of date. We replaced them with models that we thought portrayed POWER. We started to transmit messages securely by using Caesar's code.)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-17204816750352483542009-12-19T22:39:35.046-07:002009-12-19T22:39:35.046-07:00"In response to requests from the Laboratory&..."In response to requests from the Laboratory's programmatic organizations, the Office of the CIO and Network/Infrastructure Engineering Division (NIE) have decided not to interrupt Internet service or quarantine e-mail over the Winter Closure." (Office of the CIO)<br /><br /><br />Oh, how touching and so very special! Lab email for the holidays. Enjoy your Xmas holiday gift from LANS. Just don't expect gifts like this every holiday season.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-69736081659686207182009-12-19T18:57:39.981-07:002009-12-19T18:57:39.981-07:00"nternally, we have:
(1) Developed evaluation..."nternally, we have:<br />(1) Developed evaluation metrics for IT and Information Security that tie support performance back to programmatic delivery;<br />(2) Improved our portfolio management and IT governance processes;<br />(3) Streamlined processes and reduced process-imposed overhead.<br /><br />Hopefully, though, you've had the opportunity to experience our external-facing improvements first hand:<br />(1) Increased focus on customer satisfaction;<br />(2) Face-to-face meetings with the programmatic community to better understand their needs and challenges;<br />(3) Timely, consistent, and effective communication;<br />(4) Forward progress on IT and InfoSec issues affecting the mission."<br /><br />What on earth does any of it mean?<br />Point "(3) effective communication" is clearly wrong.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-20058373853580680352009-12-19T13:56:57.967-07:002009-12-19T13:56:57.967-07:00Ahmad Douglas
Senior Cyber Security Leader
Office ...Ahmad Douglas<br />Senior Cyber Security Leader<br />Office of the CIO<br /><br />Posted in Cyber Security | No Comments »<br /><br />12/19/09 11:49 AM<br /><br />To Ahmad. Thanks for being concise and not using many superlatives. Also, huh?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-26408428468903670702009-12-19T11:49:10.400-07:002009-12-19T11:49:10.400-07:00I think this fits in the "customer service&qu...I think this fits in the "customer service" comment section. This is from the internal LANL blog. From the lack of internal comments, I would project that everyone is holding back, for one reason or another, from commenting. And do they really write like this in the "real" world? Jesus mother of Mary Christ...... etc.<br /><br /><br />Colleagues,<br /><br />I'd like to begin with a quick note on the Winter Closure:<br /><br />As has been practice in previous years, please power down your desktop and laptop computers before leaving for Winter Closure. Those who intend to use the SSL Portal and RDP to connect to an office computer during the holidays will need to leave that machine powered on. We take this measure not only to save energy, but also to reduce the potential for certain types of malicious cyber activity to occur. In response to requests from the Laboratory's programmatic organizations, the Office of the CIO and Network/Infrastructure Engineering Division (NIE) have decided not to interrupt Internet service or quarantine e-mail over the Winter Closure. If you access work e-mail over the Closure, please exercise extra vigilance and do not open any questionable e-mails or attachments.<br /><br />In my view, 2009 has been a foundational year for Information Security at the Laboratory. Over the recent past, our IT and Information Security personnel have done their level best to provide us with an efficient, secure platform to drive the mission. Our focus going forward must be to tie this platform more closely to the needs of the programmatic organizations.<br /><br />This year, the Office of the CIO (OCIO) has made significant strides toward this goal.<br /><br />Internally, we have:<br />(1) Developed evaluation metrics for IT and Information Security that tie support performance back to programmatic delivery;<br />(2) Improved our portfolio management and IT governance processes;<br />(3) Streamlined processes and reduced process-imposed overhead.<br /><br />Hopefully, though, you've had the opportunity to experience our external-facing improvements first hand:<br />(1) Increased focus on customer satisfaction;<br />(2) Face-to-face meetings with the programmatic community to better understand their needs and challenges;<br />(3) Timely, consistent, and effective communication;<br />(4) Forward progress on IT and InfoSec issues affecting the mission.<br /><br />The level of support and participation we have been receiving from programmatic stakeholders throughout the Laboratory has been fantastic. We sincerely thank you for it, and hope that you will sustain that level of commitment into 2010 and beyond. In return, we in OCIO/OCISO will continue to improve, to gather input and solicit feedback. Together, we will drive IT and Information Security forward.<br /><br />From all of us in the Office of the CIO, please enjoy a happy and safe holiday season.<br /><br />Ahmad Douglas<br />Senior Cyber Security Leader<br />Office of the CIO<br /><br />Posted in Cyber Security | No Comments »Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-64274802009754706522009-12-17T11:47:45.775-07:002009-12-17T11:47:45.775-07:0012/17/09 10:39 AM
This is an old and recurring pr...12/17/09 10:39 AM<br /><br />This is an old and recurring problem since the new parking structures were built and has nothing to do with LANS. But LANS, particularly Rechtel could have thought about a solution to this problem instead of just closing it off.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-46102842769339294072009-12-17T10:39:09.511-07:002009-12-17T10:39:09.511-07:00They didn't even attempt to clear the upper le...They didn't even attempt to clear the upper level of the parking garage at Otowi for more than 1 week. When the snow-removal phone line was questioned about this they said the snow removal equipment was too heavy and the laborers had been instructed not to clear the parking structures. They didn't know of any plan to remove the snow. Good planning!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-8711250726152120132009-12-17T10:24:02.560-07:002009-12-17T10:24:02.560-07:00Good luck to you poor bastards planning to stay un...Good luck to you poor bastards planning to stay until age 65 to retire. Fat chance! Don't you know that around 50 or so you become persona non grata? Raises become non-existant. They sit you off in a corner rewriting SOP's and shit like that. That'll be the longest 15 years of your life! Go ask any 60 year old, if you can find one.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-27486509354505055112009-12-17T07:34:51.367-07:002009-12-17T07:34:51.367-07:00"Please PAY ATTENTION. Slip, trip and fall ar..."Please PAY ATTENTION. Slip, trip and fall area. Don't become a Lesson Learned." ...I take this to mean that LANS has no intention of even trying to clear ice and snow off of our walkways anymore"<br /><br />Actually, it's management's way of saying you're too dumb to walk and chew gum without falling. So pay attention!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-55807125931399887102009-12-17T04:58:10.836-07:002009-12-17T04:58:10.836-07:00Possibly the most offensive signage in the history...Possibly the most offensive signage in the history of LANS was posted around TA-3 today. The new poster-size signs are planted around walkways and parking lots and they read:<br /><br />"Please PAY ATTENTION. Slip, trip and fall area. Don't become a Lesson Learned." <br /><br />I take this to mean that LANS has no intention of even trying to clear ice and snow off of our walkways anymore. We have been duly warned that any slips and falls that occur from here on out will be attributed to the employee not paying adequate attention to the walking surfaces.<br /><br />12/16/09 8:37 PM<br /><br />Yeah, this sign really sends a negative message. I thought LANS management promoted and practiced the importance of lessons-learned from incidents/accidents? This sign really says, don't be LANS next accident or there will be repercussions. Or, don't bring any accidents/incidents to our attention, we don't wants to hear about it or count it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-9443973565096794942009-12-16T21:40:17.839-07:002009-12-16T21:40:17.839-07:008:37, seems to me they are asking for people fall ...8:37, seems to me they are asking for people fall and sue. Considering LANS had everyone come to work following the big snowstorm last week without clearing a single path for pedestrians ... well, sue baby sue.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-83607034724945460602009-12-16T20:37:22.348-07:002009-12-16T20:37:22.348-07:00Possibly the most offensive signage in the history...Possibly the most offensive signage in the history of LANS was posted around TA-3 today. The new poster-size signs are planted around walkways and parking lots and they read:<br /><br />"Please PAY ATTENTION. Slip, trip and fall area. Don't become a Lesson Learned." <br /><br />I take this to mean that LANS has no intention of even trying to clear ice and snow off of our walkways anymore. We have been duly warned that any slips and falls that occur from here on out will be attributed to the employee not paying adequate attention to the walking surfaces.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-83969052910277909462009-12-16T17:43:47.908-07:002009-12-16T17:43:47.908-07:00In choesing TCP2 over TCP1, there was a lot of fea...In choesing TCP2 over TCP1, there was a lot of fear that the UCRS pension fund would not be able to meet its obligations. That fear continues.<br /><br />12/16/09 1:40 PM<br /><br />Actually I stayed with UCRP and went TCP2 because their is a clause that if UCRP has a shortfall then DOE has to cover that shortfall for prior UC/LANL employees that are still vested in UCRP. Seems better to me. Two systems would need to fail vs one with TCP1.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-18195637232396070352009-12-16T15:47:03.897-07:002009-12-16T15:47:03.897-07:00It is the same 2,500 open cases each week. Only 50...It is the same 2,500 open cases each week. Only 500 of them still work here but the personnel stuff is not yet completed.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28220200.post-46360883444742727382009-12-16T14:32:44.656-07:002009-12-16T14:32:44.656-07:00The post starts with the statement that "Serv...The post starts with the statement that "Serving close to 2,500 employees per week, the Laboratory's Personnel Security Group is a hub -..."<br /><br />Taking into account regular employees, students, post-docs, and contractors, there are about 11,000 people working (supposedly) at LANL.<br /><br />Does this mean that over 20% of us deal with the Personnel Security Group every week?<br /><br />That does not pass the "ho-ho" test. I don't recall dealing with them except when my clearance is re-investigated about every five years.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com