The now famous "crasher squirrel" photo has been showing up almost everywhere on the web.
Not to be left out, a recent examination of the latest blog photo of Anastasio indicates he has a little furry friend. The resemblance between the two is uncanny!
-Anonymous
Anonymous,
Yes, the resemblance is uncanny. They remind me of a furry version of Dr. Evil and Mini Me.
Another thing they have in common is they both never seem to have enough nuts.
-Frank
yep, Mikey is a sqirely little pecker, eh?
ReplyDeleteLans Memorandum
ReplyDeleteFROM - Mike Anastasio
TO - All LANL Employees
"Crasher Squirrel" is our new official LANS mascot.
I'll be creating a special directorate for him to manage that involves designing a huge PR campaign which associates LANS with this fun loving, "squirrely face" creature. This new PR campaign should do wonders to help raise the lab's morale. "Crasher Squirrel" epitomizes the ability of our two main LANS partners (Bechtel and BWXT) to crash the gates at LANL and take over this lab.
Suggestions to use a more appropriate LANS mascot, "Finky the Rat", were turned down.
Also turned down were mascot ideas for "Snotty the Slug", "Sniffels the Snake" and "Bailey the Dung Beatle".
While all of these other mascot ideas were a better fit for the existing environment at LANL, I felt they failed to push the appropriate upbeat mood we wish to engender with this new mascot campaign.
Dammit! I thought it'd be me!
ReplyDeleteThis is so unfair.
I even had the imagineers and production staff make a LANL watch with the infamous 'lanl salute'* as the hands!
Signed,
Mickey M.
*LANL salute: forearms crossed in front of chest as fingers point away from self in response to questions like "Who is to blame for this catastrophe?" or "Where is the root problem?"
Neither variety of squirrel is native in these parts.
ReplyDeleteI can't wait to see Crasher Squirrel crawl up Mikey's pants during the next All-Hands meeting.
ReplyDeleteOh that'd be rich, wouldn't it?
ReplyDeleteBut then we'd have a shut down in order to conduct a full investigation of who was responsible for the cyber attack (being that the critter in question is all pixels at this point) or there would be a public thrashing of some uninvolved pest control personnel and quite possibly an escalated security incident reported for the creatures' access to the auditorium. Could get messy.
Who's that useless chubby guy standing behind our furry Director, Dr. Squirrel? Someone needs to pull that fat guy off the stage. He's hogging the limelight.
ReplyDeleteIf Crasher Squirrel crawled up Mikey's pants he wouldn't be looking for nuts, squirrels know nothings there. By the way, Nanos is in Abq. today visiting DTRA, just thought you might be interested. Looks about the same.
ReplyDeleteIf you see him again, 2:13, please tell him that he is fondly remembered in Los Alamos.
ReplyDeleteNot.
2:18 he told us at an "All Hands Meeting", remember those he called us Buttheads and Cowboys,that if he had his way he would come back to NM and have Hatch green chile everyday. Be careful if Mickey leaves. Be afraid, be very afraid.
ReplyDeleteAdmiral Butthead doesn't look so bad when you compare him to what we have today.
ReplyDeleteSorry, not afraid. It will be a joyous day indeed when the Ewok and all the Bechtel minions are sent packing.
ReplyDeleteI'll post this lab article below without comment and let others have their say...
ReplyDelete---
!!!!! * "Incredible progress" marks information security audit, say DOE auditors * !!!!!
LANL Today, August 27, 2009
CIO Harper: dedicated employees made it happen
Review of the Lab’s information security practices and requirements by HSS auditors last week culminated in high praise. Although work remains to ensure safe information and vigilant employees, the team from the DOE’s Office of Independent Oversight concluded that substantial progress had been made since the last audit in 2006.
“As auditors, we really like what we see," said one comment. "This has been really a good assessment - a really good working experience."
So much progress had been made prior to the official visit, explained CIO Tom Harper, that what had been labeled an audit was downgraded to a site assistance visit. This classification is significant because it demonstrates that the Lab is properly addressing information security issues. According to the auditors, “You [the Lab] are on the right path."
Harper attributes the high marks to “patience and support from the Laboratory community. It took a lot of preparation and a lot of work to execute the many changes needed to enhance our information security. The workforce, and the information technology and security teams, did an enormous job. They have my sincere thanks.”
Concluding remarks from the auditors echo Harper’s praise: "For the tech team, we are very impressed . . . you are much better.”
DOE’s Office of Independent Oversight
ReplyDeleteMission
The Office of Independent Oversight provides an independent assessment of the effectiveness of policies and programs in safeguards and security; cyber security; emergency management oversight; environment, safety and health (ES&H); and other critical functions of immediate interest to the Secretary, the Deputy Secretary, the Administrator of the National Nuclear Security Administration (NNSA), the Under Secretary for Energy, and the Under Secretary for Science. The office is independent of the DOE offices that develop and implement policy and programs and can therefore objectively observe Departmental operations, providing unbiased information to senior DOE managers using a systematic oversight process that emphasizes performance and performance testing.
Functions
* Maintains communication, coordination, and feedback with the Secretary and senior DOE managers to identify their issues and concerns, interface with DOE operations offices and field elements, the NNSA, congressional staff and other stakeholders.
* Provides quality management (e.g., in reviewing and approving reports, ensuring effective validation processes, and establishing quality review boards).
* Provides strategic direction (e.g., setting priorities and establishing policies).
I think this is the first time I've ever heard of them.
!!!!! * "Incredible progress" marks information security audit, say DOE auditors * !!!!!
ReplyDelete***
DOUBLE BONUS round!!!
I'll take my new LANS Ferarri in fire engine red. Have LANS also give one to that nice fellow, Tom Harper.
Oh, and for next year, have Harper "air-gap" all the networked computers at LANL. We'll call it "glove box computing" with actual glove boxes encased around all the lab PCs. That should be good for a TRIPLE BONUS!
PBIs, baby!!!
- MIKEY
LANS and NNSA seem to have launched an intense PR campaign to convince the weapon complex employees, media and Congress that they're not the total fuck-ups that they appear to be.
ReplyDelete"Incredible progress" marks information security audit, say DOE auditors (Headline)
ReplyDeleteI guess DOE will have an orgasm when they find out that LANS has mandated JB Weld to be squirted inside of all lab hard drives.