Hi, this is really hot, so please don't associate my name/email with it.
DOE Sec Bodman has circulated a draft memo that would impose annual random mandatory drug testing on any DOE fed or contractor employee that holds either a Q or L clearance.
It my understanding that it hit the street late last week for comments by lab management.
DOE Sec Bodman has circulated a draft memo that would impose annual random mandatory drug testing on any DOE fed or contractor employee that holds either a Q or L clearance.
It my understanding that it hit the street late last week for comments by lab management.
--Gussie
21 comments:
And this is a big surprise how, exactly?
Why bother with handing out clearances at all, if the clearance doesn't imply anything at all with regard to the trustworthiness of the employee?
Yet Another Kneejerk.
wow. caught the typo on the fifth line exactly:
NATIONAL NCULEAR SECURITY ADMINISTRATION
somebody there is smoking something...
Figures that it was D'Agostino. He always looked like he was on something.
So are the contractors going to have to pay for this or is DOE going to provide additional funds? At LANL this looks like 3,000 to 4,000 new drug tests each year.
Who cares. Only upper MNGT can afford drugs
These new annual tests and the time that they eat up will probably be charge to your program codes. As far as this new policy of annual piss-testing for all Q cleared employees, think of it as a big "FU" message from DOE. They'll keep this up as a means to getting more staff to bail out from the labs. That really don't want us here any longer, but the staff is a bit slow in getting the message.
9/13/07 12:30 PM
"FU" You win the noble peace prize. You have discovered a new element.
I don't believe even the staff at the various intelligence agencies are required to perform ANNUAL piss tests. Maybe at the time of employment and at some random intervals, but not annually!
This is a remarkable new requirement for those holding a Q clearance. I wonder if DOE has thought this whole thing through or perhaps it's just some knee-jerk reaction in an attempt to please certain angry Congressmen.
It sounds like L cleared are added to the testing regime. However, close reading of the memo doesn't indicate that annual tests will be required on all Q/L cleared employees. Just the HRP folks and some others (SCI holders?). All others will have a 30% population testing, so you would end up being tested roughly every 3 years. Here is the relevant section of the memo:
5. Those TDPs under DOE 0 3792.3 (for Federal employees) and 10 C.F.R.
Part 707 (for contractor employees) that are designated to be included in the
pool for 100 percent annual random sample (primarily employees in the Human
Reliability Program) will continue to be included in a 100 percent annual
sample. All other TDPs are to be included in a pool subject to a 30 percent
annual sample rate for random drug testing. For the Federal employee program,
the Office of Human Resources (HR) will implement this change immediately,
subject to the 30-day individual written notice to each affected employee
required by Order 3792.3. For contractor employee positions covered by 10
C.F.R. Part 707, the Office of Health, Safety and Security and the Office of the
General Counsel will undertake a rulemaking proceeding to amend the
regulations as expeditiously as possible to effectuate this change. In the interim,
all contractor employee clearance holders are to be immediately included as
TDPs, following consultation with the contractors as required by the Part 707
regulations, and will be subject to drug testing at the rates prescribed under the
current version of regulation.
this requirement was brought on because of the PU coke-dealer who DIDN'T test positive for drugs. so this should catch more criminals, i guess.
To cut costs, they are considering a combined polygraph/drug test. Ouch!
Word just in! LANS is asking DOE to do away with the 120 days to conduct the RIF. LANS just figured out that 120 days + 60 days = 180 days. To much money to wait for a RIF added with the nine months insurance, severance packages, etc.
how much *DOES* a drug test cost, per person? anyone know? do they do mass spec, or GC? i wonder where they hire the techs to look at and report the data. not from LANL, i suppose?
They Fedex them off to an independent lab under contract. Haven't you had to pee in the bottle yet? You get to help lick the flap and stamp the envelope.
Watch out for those poppy-seed bagels from Ruby K's though.
lick the flap?!?!? why, so they can run a forensic PCR on the DNA in our saliva?
"lick the flap?!?!? why, so they can run a forensic PCR on the DNA in our saliva?" - 9/14/07 10:51 AM
No, OccMed does the DNA thing with the skid-mark strip following your rectal exam.
== We Don't Have No Stink'n "False Positives"
== with Urine Tests at LANL
So, this TA-55 Pu glove box technician is told at the end of the week that he's going to need to report down to the LANL piss-mobile for a drug test next Monday morning. The memo he gets indicates that the urine tests at LANL are highly accurate and done using the latest in computerized urine assay technology which was developed by the brilliant scientists at LANL. False positives, the memo assures him, are impossible.
He worries all weekend that the test might be able to show he's been smoking Wacky Weed and decides to "fix" the sample. When Monday morning rolls around, he heads to the bathroom and extracts a fresh urine sample from the toilet bowl which his daughter just deposited before she left for school. Next, he heads off to the his garage where he decides to mix in some crank case oil from his truck to further confuse the urine testing apparatus. Finally, just before leaving his home, he decides to jerk off and adds it to the mix for good measure. Pleased with his little sample of deceit, he heads off to work.
He arrives at LANL and is soon called in to visit the piss-mobile. When asked to give the sample, he walks into the rest room and slips the "fixed" sample in place of his own urine. He hands the polluted sample to the tester with a smile and goes back to his office.
Weeks go by and he hears nothing. Then, one day the glove box tech gets a call to immediately show up at the LANL Security Office to discuss the results of his urine test.
"We got some good news and bad news to tell you", says the Security Officer.
"What's the good news", asks the glove box technician.
"Well", says the Security Officer, "the good news is that there was no sign of illegal drug use in your urine sample."
The TA-55 tech beathes a long sigh of relief, and then asks, "And the bad news?"
The Security Officer gives him a long, hard stare and then reports:
"According to our computerized assay print-out (A) your daughter is pregnant, (B) your car is about to blow it's number 2 cylinder head, and (C) if you don't stop jerking off you're never going to be able to operate that Pu glove box with a steady hand for much longer!".
The skid-mark strip only comes with the old, out-of-date analog exam. LANL is modern - we do ours digitally nowadays.
Now that's a good joke!
I am sure this came about because to many people with Q's and L's have been proven to be unworthy of their clearances and will be observed more close both at home and on the job from now on. Want to bet that the five year reinvestigation turns into routine investigations without warning.I would say from now on you need to watch out who you hang around with, what you say, what you type, if you drink to much, etc, etc, etc. There will be no hiding from big brother, so clean up your act. This is just your first shot. More to come I am sure.
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