Los Alamos National Laboratory: You know The Real Story. You know The Corporate Story. Now you'll know The Rest of the Story.
We need door training.
Yes, door training will be ordered up for staff ASAP. It will be launched right after the upcoming avalanche of training now being prepared to clear up staff "misunderstandings" so that employee morale "improves".
The Laboratory's initial explanation for the bunker doors being blown off their hinges was "oops!" However, high ranking DOE officials called the accident an "impressive accomplishment" in the Lab's programmatic effort to revitalize civil war technologies for use in the 21st century battle field. DOE spokesperson Chachi Arcola referred to it a "Wawee Woowoo Wawaa" moment. Lab officials now state they're confident this new development will translate into an outstanding management award fee next year. When asked during the press conference how this could be even possible, Laboratory spokesperson Kevin Roark smiled coyly and cooed ..."We're goooood."
Only training you all need is to find the exit sign and go out it.
Only training you all need is to find the exit sign and go out it.12/26/09 1:35 PMAs usual, this training is flawed. How does one "go out" an exit sign? Or do we take the sign out? Or do we turn off the exit sign while leaving? I think we need to re-train the trainers.
Here's a little tidbit that should provide some fun for a new decade... Seems that one of the HR Managers sent out an email to ONLY the HR field people before the holidays, basically indicating a hiring freeze, for both internal AND external. No hires, no movement. Nothing.Apparently this information came from Mikey's admin assistant.Anyone know about that one?
11:44 Not surprising. Since Mike gets paid for doing nothing, nothing it is!
"..basically indicating a hiring freeze, for both internal AND external. No hires, no movement. Nothing." - 11:44 amYeah, that's what usually happens before a big layoff. LANL is not meeting NNSA's mandated 5% attrition rate for this fiscal year so harsher actions will be required. Stay tuned.
Seems that one of the HR Managers sent out an email to ONLY the HR field people before the holidays, basically indicating a hiring freeze, for both internal AND external. No hires, no movement. Nothing.Wrong - friends and family are still being hired by DLs and ADs.
Wrong - friends and family are still being hired by DLs and ADs.12/29/09 11:34 AMThere's never any hiring freeze for the "friends and family" plan, jerk! Now, go do something useful, like wash my shiny black LANS sports car.- MIKEY
Anonymous at 12/29/09 11:44 am said... "..basically indicating a hiring freeze, for both internal AND external. No hires, no movement. Nothing." - ANDAnonymous at 12/29/09 11:34 AM said"Wrong - friends and family are still being hired by DLs and ADs."Yes, the real problem is the "no movement" constraint. If you are working for a jerk, then you will continue to work for the jerk!
1:29 If you are working for a LANS manager, chances are you are working for a jerk.
"1:29 If you are working for a LANS manager, chances are you are working for a jerk."12/29/09 8:18 PM"Nothing like a little stereotyping to add credibility to one's post! Or perhaps this is just an extension of the poster's bigotry. Probably doesn't like women or "them foreigners" either.Okay, okay--yes, hyperbole. Point being, let's cut the crap about all LANS managers suck, all DOE and NNSA staff are out to screw you (ahem... figuratively speaking), etc.How 'bout we raise the intellectual level of this discourse to something a bit higher than sophomoric?Sigh... Certainly the best and brightest can do better.
"Sigh... Certainly the best and brightest can do better.12/29/09 9:18 PM"Sigh indeed. Intellectual discourse is no longer a valid way to discuss issues in public forums. There are now very few television shows thatutilize any kind of intelligent debate. The new rule for discussion is short sound bites, slogans, insults, and, repetition.If the average American watches a debate between one person who uses snappy insults and slogans againts someone using a well thought out yet slightly subtle arguments guess who the average American would believe? Some posters have pointed out that we should intelligent discussions on the blog about how to improve LANL since outside sources could be reading the blog. The thing is that intelligent discussion will not work. Any outside source such as Congress, DOE or average personwill only understand slogans, insults and repetition. The people with an agenda against the lab use the standard publicly accepted version of debate and it works every time. For example "LANL blows up a building with a Civil war cannon". Of course the statement is false but they keep repeating it. Other examples include the "stolen Mustang", "a Chinese spy", "secrets for Meth", "scandal ridden lab", and so on. None of it true but is just repeated. How about the slogan "What is done at LANL that cannot be done elsewhere?" This was asked by a Congressmen in a public forum! The questions simply makes no sense but the Congressman has no need to fear looking like a total fool for asking it since the public is just fine with such questions and cannot understand why it is wrong. The list of bizarrestatements like this abound forexample take "They hate us for our freedom".On this blog you will often see someone make unsubstantiated claimslike "Everyone in Los Alamos is racist", "Everyone in Los Alamos is a drunk or drug addict" "All the scientists at LANL have lice infested beards", "LANL destroys the economy of New Mexico"and "No one at LANL could ever get a job outside of the lab" After these one or two line posts someone might post a lengthy, intelligent critique and the response will be to repeat the same unsubstantiated claim with an added insult like "so called bet and brightest" This is how the blog works and this how the media works. In order to be effective we must abandon intelligent debate and resort only to name calling, smear, and slogans. NNSA has now taken this tactic with POGO. Whey they say somethinginstead of a intelligent reply as why they are wrong the new thing is to through in some insults about credibility. This will be a far more effective approach.
"All the scientists at LANL have lice infested beards"Not true... only the ones in T Division.
""All the scientists at LANL have lice infested beards"Not true... only the ones in T Division.12/30/09 1:04 PM"You where saying X division before. Give it a break everyone knows it bullshit and it is not even funny. Go crawl back under your rock you have nothing to contribute. Try looking in the mirror you fpos and you will see a waste of a human being.
Don't know about the rest of you, but I'm shaving my beard!
12/30 1:51AM hit the nail on the head.This blog is not any different than the mind numbing sound bites that are on other media. I flicked on nighttime AM talk radio last week, and was disgusted at how ALL of the right wing talk hosts were saying the same thing about the health reform bill, creating all sorts of rubbish just to create confusion and unrest among listeners - hoping to cause enough indecisiveness to get the senate to change their vote. Some of the stuff I heard was paranoia, tidbits taken completely out of context. Nothing constructive was said, only what they made up to scare their listeners. It was sad. Seems that the 'rest of the story' blog has slipped to low points of 'intelligence' from its once high standards when the admiral was running the ship into an iceberg. Maybe 2010 will bring some change here, but I don't expect it will be positive, no matter what LANL does to the contrary.
"Sigh... Certainly the best and brightest can do better."Oh 9:18 PM, stop talking about Carol Burns. She just returned to being C-NR group leader after a tour of duty for national security. Mary Neu held up her return to the group leader status because she is jealous of Carol and fear's Carol's intelligence. After much pressure from Will Rees, Terry (former fat ass) and Mikey, Mary relented and allowed Carol to return as Group Leader -part time only. Certainly, the best and brightest can do better... whatever!
Whatever, 9:47, but don't blame MPN for the half-time status. That was CJB's demand.
I would hope that Mary Neu is smart enough to be treating Carol Burns well as the rumor from D.C. is that Carol is a finalist for a -very- prominent government position. Carol is obviously highly respected.
Both Carol and Mike are grade-A. They will probably both ultimately leave Los Alamos having been driven out by the C-students that run the place.
Has Mary Neu booked her lab-paid vacation to Europe with her hubby for this summer, yet?
1/2/10 12:22 PM wrote ..."Both Carol and Mike are grade-A. They will probably both ultimately leave Los Alamos having been driven out by the C-students that run the place."Legends in their own minds. Say, how did Carol become a Lab Fellow anyhow? She certainly is no Toni Taylor, Bette Korber or Joyce Guzik.
9:27 ... uh no, she is not like the rest - Carol's a chemist. Next question.
1/3/10 12:23 AM: Has Mary Neu booked her lab-paid vacation to Europe with her hubby for this summer, yet?Nope, sadly for Neu and Runde Pu Futures 2010 is being held in Colorado. Neu will have to try for a more exotic venue for her family European Vacation this year ....
6:33 pm: "Nope, sadly for Neu and Runde Pu Futures 2010 is being held in Colorado. Neu will have to try for a more exotic venue for her family European Vacation this year"Might I suggest... Juarez, Mexico?
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