Dec 17, 2009

From the Nut Files


Submitted for your approval (imagine Rod Serling's voiceover here).

On this blog we receive with frightening frequency untold numbers of contributions from left wing-nuts, right wing-nuts, and a few from those wing-nuts that are somewhere in between. What all of these fringe contributors seem to have in common is that they fly into semi-spectacular tizzies after it eventually dawns on them that their submission has been rejected. The usual reason for rejection is that the comment had nothing to do with LANL.

As is the case with our latest contribution in this genre. However, something about the earnestness of this one kind of tickled me, so I figured I'd go ahead & share it. It has all of the elements of dozens of previously-rejected comment submissions in this class: right-wing mouth-foaminess, a pervasive theme of "Obama is bad", all mixed in with the delicate stench of good ol' Amerikan Red Neck-iness.

Here it is. Enjoy, while imagining (as I do) wide staring eyes in which you can practically see the slowly counter-rotating spirals, and that endearing little fleck of foaming spittle that collects in the corner of his mouth as the rant progresses.

Oh, I almost forgot: !!!

Four major non-posted stories on this blog:

1. The Global Warming Hoax has arrieved at their respective doorsteps at DOE, and LLNL, Mr. Gregory Friedman (DOE), Mr. Paul Ehlenbach (LLNL), and Mr. Benjamin Santer (LLNL), due to the Sen. James M. Inhofe (R-Okla) Climategate investigation, and notifying them to retain documents related to the release of emails from CRU/UEA in UK, November 24, 2009.

1.1 DOE has paid the Junk Scientist Mr. Phil Jones at CRU/UEA for 25 years, WHY?

1.2 Doesn´t Mr. Phil Jones, DOE, and Mr. Benjamin Santer at LLNL understand the Scientific Method???

1.3 Defend the Scientific Method!!!

2. Obama Threatening To Close Offutt AFB If Nebraska Senator Ben Nelson Doesn´t Fall In Line On Health Care, as is reported by the Weekly Standard, Glenn Beck, and Sean Hannity at FNC, Rush Limbaugh, The Obama File, The Washington Examiner, Hot Air Blog, ATLAS SHRUGS, Theodore´s World, BNI, ACE OF SPADES HQ, and WND. (Offutt AFB in Nebraska is the headquarters for US STRATEGIC Command.)

2.1 Defend Our Defenders!!!

3. "Harvard Simulation: U.S. Will Fail to Stop Iran Nukes," IsraelNN.com, December 6, 2009, "Iran successfully simulates nuclear wahead detonation - report," DEBKAfile Special Report, December 4, 2009, and "Iran´s Missile Rattling Signals Command Defiance and Rising Military Threat," December 16, 2009, at http://blog.heritage.org/.

3.1 Defend US Against a Nuclear Armed Iran!!!

4. "41 Senators to Obama: No START Without Nuclear Modernization," December 17, 2009, athttp://blog.heritage.org/, and "Don´t Circumvent the Senate´s Important Role in Negotiating Strategic Arms Reductions Treaties," December 9, 2009, by Baker Spring, WebMemo #2725, at the Heritage Foundation.

4.1 Defend Our Defenders!!!


53 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Obama Threatening To Close Offutt AFB If Nebraska Senator Ben Nelson Doesn´t Fall In Line On Health Care, as is reported by the Weekly Standard, Glenn Beck, and Sean Hannity at FNC, Rush Limbaugh, The Obama File, The Washington Examiner, Hot Air Blog, ATLAS SHRUGS, Theodore´s World, BNI, ACE OF SPADES HQ, and WND. (Offutt AFB in Nebraska is the headquarters for US STRATEGIC Command.)"

ATLAS SHRUGS? Wow Ayn Rand knew about Obama in 1957!

Doug Roberts said...

Almost, 10:31. What you should really have said was,

"ATLAS SHRUGS? Wow Ayn Rand knew about Obama in 1957!!!"

Anonymous said...

Well if Fixed news and it's cadre of roaming reporters says it's so, then it must be! Got to go now, 2012 is right around the corner. Darwin, by the way, was married to Samantha and I never heard him mention anything about evolution. So there!

Anonymous said...

Doug - it is bad enough that we must listen to MIKEY babble on and on. Must we also have this guy?

Anonymous said...

Is the box a gift for LANS management? They certainly need nuts. It's just missing a red bow.

Anonymous said...

"1.3 Defend the Scientific Method!!!


"2.1 Defend Our Defenders!!!"


"3.1 Defend US Against a Nuclear Armed Iran!!!"

I want these as bumber stickers with the numbers and exlamation marks.

Anonymous said...

P.S. What a douchebag!!!!

Anonymous said...

Good comment from the wing-nut. Now take it below and have it decrypted.

Anonymous said...

The discussions that seem to be taking place do not appear to have much value or information content.

I expected to see discussions regarding some very current and relevant issues, activities, or events at LANL. For example:
1) Recent safety related events,
2) PADGS program re-organization,
3) Direction of PADGS programs'
&
4) six month review of of the new PADGS.

Anonymous said...

Alright back to serious stuff.

1) The recent snow plow removal was very poor. I know a huge amount of complaints where sent in but there was little response. Some staff where able to talk to some of the higher management about it and felt they where just brushed off. There has been worse storms in Los Alamos in the past 10 years yet this was the worse job I have ever seen done. What has changed? Did the budget cuts reduce the number of plows or people who could plow. The big response so far has been to put out some insulting and useless signs that say "do not become a lesson learned!" Every single person I know thinks these signs are idiotic. Another problem was the salt containers, many of them had trash in them. I guess we cut back on how often trash gets picked up at LANL.

2) There seems to be an increasingly large number of
toilets that are permanently out of service.

3) There are now plans for car searches. There are still trying to figure out some of the legalities of this since one of the plans is to search cars at the guard gate. They are looking for alcohol, firearms, and lab computers. One rumor is that they are doing this in retaliation for the survey results to send staff a message.

4) More cyber security is on the way. Much more.

5) On a side note I along with others have noticed a rapid increase in general hostility and
uncooperativeness between support staff and technical staff. I am not sure what the root cause is but is sure is making for an unhealthy workplace.

6) The most depressing news is that LANL has sunk to the lowest point it ever has in terms of efficiency and moral and I also suspect that in actuality that we are more likely less secure and less safe than ever, but we have improved ways of covering it up better. The recent NNSA rating of 90% is in complete contradiction to this. Somehow this who scheme seems absolutely unsustainable.

Anonymous said...

The discussions that seem to be taking place do not appear to have much value or information content.

I expected to see discussions regarding some very current and relevant issues, activities, or events at LANL.

12/19/09 9:34 AM

You came to the wrong place. This is the "LANL: The Rest of the Story" blog. Where did you think you were?

Anonymous said...

11:37 Your points are accurate and correct. Therefore you are a "whiner" by the standard of LANS management and Bechtel bullshit artists.

Anonymous said...

Is the box a gift for LANS management? They certainly need nuts. It's just missing a red bow.

12/18/09 7:03 AM

No the box is a gift from LANS Management to NNSA. Their sending them their nuts since they didn't have any. Notice no nuts larger than a cashew. Bret Knapp's nuts must have fallen to the bottom since they were so tiny.

Anonymous said...

11:37AM: Regarding point 3. That isn't really news. Here's a lab security handout from 3 years ago:

http://supply.lanl.gov/homefeatures/subcontracorsecuritysummit/SecurityHints&POC's.pdf

"Your vehicles, belongings, and/or person are subject to search while on Laboratory property. You must comply with the Protective Force’s instructions when searched."

This has been a policy on the books for years, but never enforced. Much like drug testing was on the books for years, but never enforced until just a few years ago. Why didn't people whine in the past when the policy was sitting there right in front of them?

Anonymous said...

The discussions that seem to be taking place do not appear to have much value or information content.

I expected to see discussions regarding some very current and relevant issues, activities, or events at LANL. For example:
1) Recent safety related events,
2) PADGS program re-organization,
3) Direction of PADGS programs'
&
4) six month review of of the new PADGS.

12/19/09 9:34 AM
1) There is a very hazardous condition on Pajarito entering into TA-55. Early on December 9, following the snow day the sidewalks were not plowed toward TA-55. Consequently pedestrians were forced to walk outside the vehicle barriers in the middle of the street where vehicles were sliding. I was informed by a taxi driver that there were several car accidents at that intersection on December 8th and 10th. I was also informed that many workers that were to plow/move snow were informed to go home early on December 9 because it was assumed that the Lab would be closed until 10:00, which it wasn't. This also contributed or was the cause of little to no work accomplished to clear snow early on December 9th. Additionally, there are more pedestrians in that intersection because of significantly reduced parking near TA-55. Someone will eventually be struck by a car here and either severely injured or killed. You heard it here! Is anyone home LANS? HELLO! Worthless. I informed a LANS Manager who indicated that was not in his responsibility.

2) I'm more interested in the reorganization that Bret Knapp has initiated in ADW and in particular in X-Division. The only reason that Knapp has indicated is, "it is too big... ugh". Knapp has no plan, schedule, or goals for anything, he just goes in there and starts dismantling and destroying anything in sight people, capability, anything.

Anonymous said...

"This has been a policy on the books for years, but never enforced. Much like drug testing was on the books for years, but never enforced until just a few years ago. Why didn't people whine in the past when the policy was sitting there right in front of them?

12/19/09 3:07 PM"

Reread your own post and you will find your answer. Have you ever seen the movie memento? Well I guess you would not have remembered if you did.

Anonymous said...

6:01 Knapp IS the wrecking crew; that is what he does. He has no technical skills, no management experience, no applicable education, nothing to add value of any sort. He was hired to destroy ("fix" in LANS-speak) everything in his path and he is very good at it and very proud of his "work". He is the canonical LANS manager.

Anonymous said...

"3) There are now plans for car searches." (11:37 AM)


..to be followed shortly by regular anal cavity searches.

I'm sure that one is also buried somewhere in the regs, so we'll all be told by some loyal "LANS-man" to quite our bitching and take it like a he-man.

Anonymous said...

Everything a LANL is fine and morale is better than ever. All this talk about low morale is just some kind of "misunderstanding". Go back and re-read Alan Bishop's recent memo and it will all become clear to you.

Anonymous said...

"3) There are now plans for car searches." (11:37 AM)"

this is not a big deal. in fact, it's sorta embarrassing that all we need to do is give them our badge and wave in hi! HI!!!

Anonymous said...

Car searches are nothing new. When I worked at TA-21 (until the mid-90's) we used to get hit with them on a regular basis.

Anonymous said...

"Car searches are nothing new. When I worked at TA-21 (until the mid-90's) we used to get hit with them on a regular basis.en "

Ditto. Those of us who work in the TA-55 corridor have been hit with car searches when pulling out of the parking lot.

Anonymous said...

re: 12/19, 11:37 a.m.

(1) 60-65 mph winds blowing around 14" of snow. And your sidewalks are not perfectly shoveled and dry? Get some boots (that grip) and quit whining. You work at 7,300' elevation in the mountains. The support staff that shovel your sidewalks are expected to do more with less every year (see below). Unfortunately, Mother Nature did not get that memo. Don't want snow? Go to LLNL. I understand everything there is just hunky-dory.

(5) Those ungrateful support staff making noise again? Maybe it's because they keep being told to do more with less to help implement all the contractual requirements the technical staff don't give a shit about and work to manage/implement decrepit, obsolete systems/processes that are so out of date it is not even funny. Then the technical staff bitch and moan because the support staff don't get down on their knees and bow and ask how they might serve them today. Damn those ungrateful support staff!

The reality is we're all in this together. Before you bitch/whine/complain about somebody not doing something to make your life easier, stop for a second and consider what might be impacting their ability to do so. My guess is that there are very few individuals that are maliciously trying to make things difficult for others (yes, even "Mikey").

Oh, and before I forget, Merry Christmas, Peace on Earth, and Good Will to Men (and Women).

Anonymous said...

despite the run on sentences and rambling on, 12/20/09 8:45 PM is right. this is lans' dirty little secret for keeping costs down...not replacing support staff when they leave. tsm's demand a lot now...more than ever from support staff (concur)...but when staff leave, no one is replacing them. that's why the best thing to do is to be friends with these people (doing more than saying hi, etc), rather than being a pain in the ass.

Anonymous said...

My car has also been searched as I exited TA-46. Probably three or four times in the past few years.

Anonymous said...

12/20/09 8:45 PM

I do not understand your point. If you read the thread no one is blaming support staff for the snow problem. They are blaming LANS. We have had worse snow storms with higher winds in the past and with a single day off the snow was not a problem. So what happened? The posts seem to indicate that is was a problem with poor management that did not communicate effectively with the support staff. Another problem is what you have said is that it is possible that the number of support staff is being cut due to the extra cost under LANS. It just shows you that putting in LANS has made the place less safe and less efficient.


5) The increase in the hostility between support staff and technical staff is again a management failure. You have fallen for the bait and blame the technical staff for being jerks.
Sorry this does not fly, the technical staff at LANL is the same as the technical staff at the other labs and they do not have these problems. Now I am not sure about the support staff but it seems that they cannot be all the different either so again we are left with management as being the problem.

"My guess is that there are very few individuals that are maliciously trying to make things difficult for others (yes, even "Mikey")."

Incompetence does not intend to be malicious but the results of either are the same.

Anonymous said...

8:53 am: "The increase in the hostility between support staff and technical staff is again a management failure."

What a crock. Explain how hostility between two groups of people is the fault of a third group. How about just being a little be bit less of an arrogant bastard? Or is "management" keeping you from behaving civilly? I suspect you don't believe you bear any responsibility at all for your own behavior.

Anonymous said...

tsm's shit upon by management = tsm's shitting on support staff. should they be accountable for their behavior? of course! do they care? hell no! just look at t-div and the constant cycling of support staff.

Anonymous said...

"What a crock. Explain how hostility between two groups of people is the fault of a third group. How about just being a little be bit less of an arrogant bastard? Or is "management" keeping you from behaving civilly? I suspect you don't believe you bear any responsibility at all for your own behavior.

12/21/09 10:47 AM"

Please define who is being arrogant, the support staff or the technical staff? Support staff can be just as arrogant or more so than the technical staff. I suspect you do not believe you bear any responsibility for YOUR own behavior.

In any case it is utterly obvious how management can be at fault. They ignore input from both technical and support staff. They can exacerbate existing problems by simply blaming technical and support staff. They can introduce ill thought out rules that cause innumerable problems and conflicts between staff. Again these problems where not nearly as bad 5 to 10 years ago and the technical staff is not that different so you simply cannot say that the technical staff has become more arrogant. If anything with all the things that have happened the technical staff has become much more subdued. I do not who you are or what your problem is but you have yet to give any kind of logical argument for your case. Do you realize how you look every time you say "arrogant bastard"?

Anonymous said...

"just look at t-div and the constant cycling of support staff."

Just did, little or no cycling and the support are fairly happy. Try getting some facts right before you post. You just killed your own
argument.

Anonymous said...

Did you look at T-1?

Anonymous said...

"Did you look at T-1?

12/21/09 5:19 PM"

Oh ya, you know that due to rules there has to be a ratio of differnet types of support staff. Nothing about how people are treated. Try again.

Anonymous said...

What is wrong with T-1?

Anonymous said...

wtf are you talking about mr. "facts" man??? besides, shouldn't you be AT WORK rather than on the blog? must be nice charging time to overhead. :P

Anonymous said...

The big response so far has been to put out some insulting and useless signs that say "do not become a lesson learned!" Every single person I know thinks these signs are idiotic.

i agree...it's like they figured they took care of the problem by cutting back on shoveling and putting up signs telling you not to fall down. that's like a mental institution that fired all the doctors and staff and put up signs telling patients to "cheer up" before locking them inside and leaving.

Anonymous said...

as far as ALL of that stupid, embarrassing & infantilizing signage goes, it is the fault of the "institutional wsst" folks. i'm sure they are well-meaning, yet they are certainly delusional. i've been considering bringing this up with the division-level wsst, but i'm not sure what to suggest to improve it, and i don't like to complain about something unless i have a better idea to suggest. any thoughts?

Anonymous said...

OK, here's an example of exactly how management is to blame for the escalating tensions between support and technical staff:

Travel.

First, LANS decides it's a good idea to have the traveler bear the entire responsibility for the advance costs of the trip, only applying for reimbursement after the trip is completed.

Then, they select a system that's relatively reservation-friendly, but very non-intuitive on the reimbursement end.

Next, LANS reduces the overhead support at the group and division levels, stripping group-level administrative support to the barest of bones. This action ensured that most technical staff would have to process their own reimbursement requests, again using a system that requires at least 2x per month use to maintain proficiency.

Finally, LANS decimates the support staff for reimbursement check processing. This helps ensure that phone support to technical staff is minimally available.

Now you have the perfect LANS-created storm. Travelers have every incentive to demand a quick turnaround on their reimbursement checks, because they are the ones bearing the full cost of the trip. Their credit rating is at stake if the bills are not paid on time. They pay the finance charges to US Bank. Or, their personal checking account takes the $2000+ hit for every trip, until reimbursement is received.

In the early days of Concur, it was not uncommon to hear from program office staff who were personally $10-20K in the hole while awaiting reimbursement for back-to-back trips aimed at raising money for the Lab.

With Travel Reimbursement support minimally staffed, it only takes one departure or extended medical leave, or as we've seen, an anomalously heavy load of requests, to bring the system to its knees.

Result: travelers are irate because their personal finances are at risk; support staff are harried taking phone calls from frustrated travelers.

Meanwhile, Mike and his cronies enjoy their 3-day reimbursement turnaround, blissfully unaware of the experiences of the average traveler. You can't even really blame Travel staff for this, because I'm certain they are under orders from their own management to make sure the Leadership Team is taken good care of.

That, my friends, is an example of why LANS management is to blame. It's the complete lack of system-level thinking, combined with an utter disregard for how their decisions affect the individuals who must live with them. `

Anonymous said...

12/21 4:41 pm: "Please define who is being arrogant, the support staff or the technical staff?"

Both.

"...you simply cannot say that the technical staff has become more arrogant."

I didn't.

"Do you realize how you look every time you say "arrogant bastard"?"

Yep.

Anonymous said...

"Meanwhile, Mike and his cronies enjoy their 3-day reimbursement turnaround, blissfully unaware of the experiences of the average traveler." - 8:17 AM


Fuck you all! I'm the lab Director and you're not.

Do you get to always travel first class on lab travel? Do you drive a LANS suppplied luxury sports car? Do you make $1 million per year plus bonus? Do your business buddies go by names like Riley Bechtel? Nah, they don't so STFU or leave. It's that dirt simple.

Now, someone go call Bret Knapp and have him go attack some more fat asses over in X Division! God, I hate this place.

- MIKEY

Anonymous said...

"Do you realize how you look every time you say "arrogant bastard"?"

Yep.

12/22/09 8:10 AM

OOOOOKAAAAAY

Maybe it is time to admit your crack problem

Anonymous said...

12/17/09 10:31 PM wrote:

"ATLAS SHRUGS? Wow Ayn Rand knew about Obama in 1957!"

Hey dipshit, Ayn Rand wrote "Atlas Shrugged". The reference was to another blog which Ayn Rand would have never seen.

Anonymous said...

Hey dipshit, Ayn Rand wrote "Atlas Shrugged". The reference was to another blog which Ayn Rand would have never seen.

12/22/09 1:50 PM


...Sigh...

Anonymous said...

"wtf are you talking about mr. "facts" man??? besides, shouldn't you be AT WORK rather than on the blog? must be nice charging time to overhead. :P

12/21/09 6:19 PM"

Did you ever that think the person might be on vacation this week? I guess thinking is not your strong point.

Anonymous said...

It seems that the anti-LANL anti-scientists post are becoming increasingly asinine, ugly, and sad.
What is going on? Try and put a little thought into your posts.

Anonymous said...

The drug testing policy was always on the books but the lab hired a forensic guy out of APD to enforce it. Now the reefer addicts are dropping like flies.

Anonymous said...

6:01 Knapp IS the wrecking crew; that is what he does. He has no technical skills, no management experience, no applicable education, nothing to add value of any sort. He was hired to destroy ("fix" in LANS-speak) everything in his path and he is very good at it and very proud of his "work". He is the canonical LANS manager.

12/19/09 8:01 PM

I knew Knapp and Anastasio at Livermore. You are absolutely correct. The Livermorons came here with overrated and bogus credentials. It was a desperate act by UC. Sounds like Knapp beat the shit out of you too, there are many of us. Mikey is not only condoning Knapp's viscous and hateful behavior but rewarding and promoting it! Knapp now has X-Division by the kohonas and he will tear them off, thats why he's splitting them in a two. It will eventually catch up with these bastards.

Anonymous said...

The reality is we're all in this together. Before you bitch/whine/complain about somebody not doing something to make your life easier, stop for a second and consider what might be impacting their ability to do so. My guess is that there are very few individuals that are maliciously trying to make things difficult for others (yes, even "Mikey").

Oh, and before I forget, Merry Christmas, Peace on Earth, and Good Will to Men (and Women).

12/20/09 8:45 PM

The only thing impacting LANS ability to do something about these problems is interference counting and dividing their Christmas bonuses. How much did you get?

Anonymous said...

"Mikey is not only condoning Knapp's viscous and hateful behavior but rewarding and promoting it! Knapp now has X-Division by the kohonas and he will tear them off, thats why he's splitting them in a two. It will eventually catch up with these bastards." (5:00 AM)


Catch up with them? No it won't.

Mike and his little attack dog will retire rich and comfortable. No one cares what they do to LANL any longer. This is the key fact that many staff members at LANL refuse to understand after over 3 years of the LANS/Bechtel destruction process.

Tape this up on your wall: "NO ONE CARES!". Maybe with time it will finally sink in through the thick layers of denial.

Anonymous said...

Tape this up on your wall: "NO ONE CARES!". Maybe with time it will finally sink in through the thick layers of denial.

12/23/09 12:02 PM

Absolutely correct. And what do you do when "nobody cares"? You take care of your own business, not wait for someone to "do something." It ain't gonna happen, folks. You are solely in charge of the rest of your life, Get on with it, the best you can. You are on your own.

Anonymous said...

"Knapp's viscous behavior"

Nice image. Goes with the slimy reputation.

Anonymous said...

Tape this up on your wall: "NO ONE CARES!". Maybe with time it will finally sink in through the thick layers of denial.

12/23/09 12:02 PM

Absolutely correct. And what do you do when "nobody cares"? You take care of your own business, not wait for someone to "do something." It ain't gonna happen, folks. You are solely in charge of the rest of your life, Get on with it, the best you can. You are on your own.

12/23/09 6:51 PM

Is that you Craig Leasure? That brown stuff all over your face and hands really does smell bad in spite of what Knapp tells you.

Anonymous said...

Absolutely correct. And what do you do when "nobody cares"? You take care of your own business, not wait for someone to "do something." It ain't gonna happen, folks. You are solely in charge of the rest of your life, Get on with it, the best you can. You are on your own.

12/23/09 6:51 PM

Is that you Craig Leasure? That brown stuff all over your face and hands really does smell bad in spite of what Knapp tells you.

12/24/09 6:13 AM

Nope, just someone who had enough and got out. No whining, no hand wringing, no expectation of "help" from anyone. Just me recognizing that I and my family weren't going to proper at LANL. Simple solution: do what it takes to find another path. If you let yourself be dependent on anyone else, you lose. You can whine until you die, which will happen sooner at LANL. Man up, and just do it.

Anonymous said...

"Man up, and just do it."

12/27/09 6:05 PM


Good advice, but few of those still stuck at LANL will probably take it.